An Interview with Merrick Maples

Note: For those of you who haven’t yet met him, I’d like to introduce you to Merrick Maples, my main character. He’s a bit mischievous, but he’s great. Here’s the transcript of our recent interview.

Me: So, Merrick, tell me a little bit about yourself. How old are you? What do you like to do in your spare time? Things like that.
Merrick: I’m Merrick Andrew Maples, and I’m thirteen. Um … I like to watch gory movies and torment my sister’s cheerleading friends. It’s awesome. One time, my sister brought her friends over after school, and I threw a football at them. This one girl didn’t duck when I yelled, and I broke her nose like I saw that one time on The Brady Bunch show. I laughed really hard ’til Mom grounded me. But it was totally worth it.
Me: I see. So, you enjoy picking on your sister more than anything else then?
Merrick: Totally.
Me: Well, what else do you like to do in your spare time? Do you have any favorite books or music or hobbies?
Merrick: I like the Lord of the Rings trilogy. All the battles and stuff are cool.
Me: How about music?
Merrick: Eh, I don’t really have any favorites; I just like whatever’s on the radio at the time.
Me: So what’s your favorite thing to do on summer vacation? Baseball? Swimm—
Merrick: [cutting me off] I don’t like swimming. I hate it.
Me: Really? Why?
Merrick: One time when I was a kid, I fell in a pool. Now, I just don’t like it. Bad memories, I guess. But I do like baseball. I really like the Cubs.
Me: Yeah, I like the Cubs cap you’re wearing.
[Merrick’s sister interrupts from another room]
Lorena: You’d better ask him about something besides baseball, or he’ll talk about it all day. That’s all he ever talks about.
Merrick: Shut it, Lorena!
Me: Lorena, would you like to join us?
Merrick: She can do her interview next week. It’s not about her all the time …
Me: [laughing] Okay. Getting back to our questions, is there anything you’d like to tell the readers about yourself that they don’t already know? Maybe you could tell us about what it’s like to have a twin sister.
Merrick: Sure, I guess. It was cool when we were kids. It was fun to have somebody to share my birthday and stuff. We could usually talk our grandma into giving us extra ice cream and cake. Now that we’re older, she’s annoying. She’s always doing girlie stuff like painting her nails or talking about boys with her friends. I liked her better when we played baseball together.
Me: Surely she’s not all bad, is she?
Merrick: Nah, I guess she’s not all bad. She still likes horror movies, so I guess she’s still kind of okay.
Me: Well it looks like we’ve run out of time for now, but I’d love for you to come back and do a second interview soon. Maybe you and your sister could even do one together. How would you feel about that?
Merrick: Yeah! Can we come back tomorrow?
Me: [laughing] Maybe not tomorrow, but very soon. Do you have any parting words for our readers?
Merrick: Yeah. You can read more about my sister and me in the upcoming novel Merrick Maples and the Legend of the Lost Stone. Can we go get some pizza now? I’m hungry.

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